its been a long month of preparing for an auction that is going to happen in two days... for once i'm not feeling overwhelmed because of it, just tired. i've put in some long days so that i can go and see the wedding on friday and have a short break before the actual event. i'm so happy to see cody and trevor again. its weird when you live on the road with people for a month or so and then years separate you from each other. i can't wait to have a small reunion of sorts. :)
my mind has been working over time, and sometimes i wish there was a better way to quiet it. i always hold so much hope and promise in my heart for a great fall season, because it is my favorite time of year, but so often its not as happy as i would like it.
my fall music obsession is Secret and Whisper. and all i really want is a break. i would love to escape for a week or so and just sit on a beach, soak in the sun and forget the world around me. of all the negatives about my time in florida, the beach was always my place for thinking and journaling. i miss that.
sometimes i wish i could learn the lessons that the Lord would have me learn so that i can move on from my past. i guess thats what i get for having so many layers. when you start to peel away one and find healing there is always another more deeply hidden. I pray to get to the end of these layers soon.
why do i let certain things hold so much control over me. why do i put unrealistic expectations on those who can never live up to them. hmmm, i guess i'm at an interesting point in my life and i don't know what to do about it besides trust that God has a plan that i cannot see right now.
i need an adventure. anything. and i'm so thankful for a friend coming to visit and for what will hopefully be like a family reunion of sorts on december 4th! my heart is so looking forward to that trip.
my heart is a messy place right now and i don't like it, but the Lord is helping me to fix it. :)
and i have to go on record saying that i have one of the best cousins in the world! thats right, be jealous! haha. if my moving back to michigan has blessed me in any way its getting to build a relationship with two of my cousins...
ok, its getting late and i should head home from work so i can be rested and ready to face the day tomorrow, its going to be another long day. but God is good and i will make it thru this week, and the next and the next and i will eventually be able to look back on this and laugh at how stressed i let myself get over nothing.
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